The Mormon Church Is Really True!! I Had An Amazing Awakening Or Rapture Watching The Mormon General Conference!! Help..My Bosom Is On Fire!!
I was listening to the talk on tithing and how badly they need my money and my bosom just started to got hotter and hotter and it was burning like crazy, completely out of control. Then I started crying uncontrollably and sobbing like a little baby, feeling the depths of my awful sins and the need to humble myself and repent of my most awful sin of Apostasy, from the "one and only true church on the face of the planet."
I knew that I had to immediately erase all my blogs, my podcasts and head back to the Lord's church starting next week and confess everything and get that church court scheduled ASAP. I knew that I was indeed a filthy, dirty "disease germ full of darkness" like Boyd K. Packer calls me and an "anti-Christ/son of perdition", like Brigham Young called me.
I also strongly support Ballard's comments now, that people "should run from us apostates as fast as they can." We are indeed very dangerous individuals that are more threatening than predators, like the bishop's handbook says. I realized that the past history of Mormonism doesn't matter at all or one iota, no matter how awful, dark and ugly it truly is and that the racism in Mormonism is indeed just "little flicks of history", just like the beloved and current Mormon Prophet, Gordon B. Hinckley says.
I mean who cares if Joseph Smith was a God ordained, secret, serial adulterer that had sex with other men's wives and little girls as young as 14 years old, without telling his first wife Emma. Does that make the church false? Of course not, it doesn't even matter a little bit...what was I thinking?
Yeah, he was the founder, but so what, as he was just a man like us and human and besides, they don't do that stuff now and I wouldn't care if they did. I'd hand over any of my loved ones to the Prophet in a heartbeat, if Hinckley asked for them. What matters is now!! The inspired past of Mormonism is closed and we shouldn't dwell on it or worry about all that stuff that Satan uses to rob us of our testimonies and lead us down the road to hell.
All of you evil apostates and sons of perdition out there really need to repent of your awful sins, before it's too late and God punishes you to a lower Kingdom, if it isn't already too late. Put aside your pride and realize that facts, truth and evidence don't matter at all, because it's really all about the "burning bosom" and "HOW YOU FEEL" and nothing else.
It's time to realize that there is only "one true path to Eternal happiness", just like "Preach my gospel" says and it's to be a Mormon and no other way. I feel sorry for all of you poor lost souls out there that don't have the "one and only true gospel" in your lives, that have allowed Satan to seal you his. You're all pathetic and evil and you need to get back on the straight and narrow path and grab onto that iron rod Lehi and Joseph's dad talked and dreamed about.
I also realize that Bednar was right on the money, when he said that if you men are dating a woman that won't remove her 2nd earing from each ear, that you should end the relationship immediately, no questions asked, no matter what plans you have or how much you love each other. And he's right, it was never about the earrings you fools, but about "exact obedience" to Gordon B. Hinckley. That's what it's really all about!! What made you think the earrings were the issue anyway?
Whether David A. Bednar is inspired by God to talk about pickles or earrings, he is one amazing man of God, who speaks directly for Jesus Christ himself and he is so very humble in his way and manner of speaking and I love how he properly and carefully annunciates each word perfectly. He is just a very humble servant of Jesus Christ and nothing more. All I can say is wow!!
You can clearly see why Jesus told him to name that building at BYU-Idaho after Gordon B. Hinckley and why he was then rewarded by being called as an Apostle. Jesus rewarded him for that great deed in honoring the modern day Moses. Gordon B. Hinckley was just obeying Jesus Christ when he named David A. Bednar as Apostle.
I also know beyond a shadow of a doubt, with every fiber of my being, that Jesus Christ commanded Gordon B. Hinckley to allow alcohol to be served in Jesus' new malls and that it had nothing to do with money or the millions they got from each restaurant that bought the space. Jesus saw it as a way to bring in more non-members to shop at his malls and then to try to convert them later.
I mean if there wasn't any alcohol, they wouldn't want to go there, right? Who wants to go to McDonald's or Wendy's, when you can eat at Applebee's or the Olive Garden or Chili's, right? Just hearing that there is alcohol, will bring in people from everywhere and all around the world, to have a drink at the Mormon's/Jesus' malls and then the missionaries will be able to jump into action.
I hear(and it may just be a faith promoting rumor) that they might institute free drawings in the bars for miscellaneous prizes, in order to help collect names for the missionaries, which is just brilliant and directly inspired by God and Jesus, through their Prophet Hinckley, the only man on the entire planet that can speak for God. Like they say,the Lord works in very mysterious ways and we just can't understand him sometimes and it will all make sense in the next life.
If God/Jesus needs to tempt people with booze, in order to convert them to the "one true Mormon Gospel", then so be it and who are we to question the ways of God/Jesus and Gordon B. Hinckley. To even question a little bit is complete and utter blasphemy and it disgusts me that lowlife scumbag apostates or weak members, would even think of doing this awful, highly offensive thing.
I could go on, but it's time for me to now call on all of you evil "disease germ" apostates to repentance and to return to the "one true church on planet earth" and repent and forsake your sins of apostasy. Gordon B. Hinckley is the Prophet and you must repent before it is too late and you are burned at the 2nd coming, which is just right around the corner.
It's never too late to have a change of heart, at least for some of you evil sinner apostates!!
APRIL FOOLS...LOL!!
Samuel the Utahnite
Labels: April fools, corruption, cult, fraud, joke, LDS, lies, Mormon
posted by Samuel the Utahnite @ 2:32 PM
10 comments
10 Comments:
Nice April fools joke but cant you see that chimp on the front page being the next prophet if he pays enough tithing. I'm an ex-member who will feel forever scorned by the church and it's members. The blatant racism that goes on in the church and its TBMs. Short synopsis: I was a "troubled youth" meaning i had fun as a kid no harm in that. Well while i was in college some of my friends said i should come to church with them, and so i did, and it was interesting. Well eventually the Elders showed up at my dorms and we had the discussions and I decided that I should become baptized. Life was going well, or so I thought. I got a calling, I received the Melchizedek Priesthood, was doing home teachings and all my mormonly duties. Well one day I met a girl we’ll call sara for her privacy, and we started hanging out and then eventually dating…that was the first mistake. From the first time we started dating people stopped talking to me, like I was diseased. Her mother told her that if we didn’t break it off she would disown her. But we continued dating because we were both stubborn as to what everyone else thought. We figured who cares if I’m black and she’s white, yeah I know some people aren’t too keen on it but grow up we are in the 21st century. We fought the odds for 2 years, feeling like criminals because we had to sneak around just to see each other in peace. Eventually it seemed as if it was dying down, and we decided we should get married, because we wanted to continue on the right way as good MoMo’s (that’s what my sister called me) and start a family…second mistake. Once our intentions were known all hell broke loose, her mother told her the family would disown her and “she doesn’t care if she’s called a racist, and that sara need to find a good Caucasian boy” Eventually word got to the bishop who was so kind to ask me to come speak with him. I saw no issue with it so I said sure, when I showed up I knew something was up. I had barely sat down when he started in letting me know that he thought that my marrying sara would be a bad idea. “Think of the scorn and pain and suffering your children might have to go through growing up as bi-racial children. ( I know first hand, because all 3 of my siblings are married inter-racially and their kids ranging from 2-8 are doing just fine) The finally blow came from me when he asked “where you planning on getting married in the temple?” I said yes, I was shocked…why wouldn’t I want to. That’s the Mormon way to be. He had that sound in his voice like he already knew it would never happen. And it was then he said he’d he wasn’t sure if I was temple worthy and that he and the bishopric would have to discuss a renewal of my temple recommend. I didn’t see why not as I had just recently done baptisms for the dead. Well eventually the suggested that I should go on a mission, as I had yet to go on one seeing I was a convert. But I was 24, self supporting, almost done with college and had a good job lined up. Yes I know that sounds selfish, but when I became a convert they implied it’s understood and not everyone can go. But here and now I should devout my life to becoming a missionary.(who don’t get me wrong at times I envied those would were able go) Well long story short, I ended up splitting up from Sara, lost my temple recommend, and my TBM friends, including the missionary that baptized me wouldn’t talk to me anymore. The last week I went to church I stood up in Priesthood to give my testament and I read this:
“For such are false apostles, deceitful workers, transforming themselves into the apostles of Christ. And no marvel; for Satan himself is transformed into an angel of light. Therefore it is no great thing if his ministers also be transformed as the ministers of righteousness; whose end shall be according to their works.” 2 Corinthians 11: 13-15
And I promptly left. To this day I’m partially glad because I’d still be a drone in their collective, but it still sucks to be treated like dirt.
The ACLU
adreian
I love your testimony clincher in priesthood !! lol
Closest I had was when my recent convert friend brought up Joseph Smith Using A hat and Peep stone in Elders Quorom ( I guess thats what you mean by priesthood -I'm just an investigator ). Well the whole class went quite , the teacher just said thanks for shaing that with us and it was brushed away !! hahahahah He is a recent convert who's on his way out now !!
To everyone on here , I just want to comment on the apparent increase in church member No's . I've been investigating fo over 18 months .The only converts I've seen get baptised are
1 young girl ( she hasnt a clue about anything of the past history )from Nigeria originally I think her husband is still stuck there .
4 asylum seekers all from the African countries - all living on their own lonely and not allowed to work legally while on Asylum. The church helps them get Asylum in England .This is a good thing for them , thats why they joined the church really for help and friendship .They don't really believe the book of mormon , I've talked with them .One got his ticket to BYU America recently ( in private he told me its just a cult ) but he wants to get to America ! Another is still a Pentacostalist , I asked him ! lol he's a clever theologian and educated , I have a laugh with him , he knows I know alot too ! lol
1 other joined originally from Zimbabwe, a nice kid , but his wife is not too keen and he doesn't attend much really .I asked him why is he black skinned and me white skinned . He replied because our beautiful God made us this way with many colours . I agreed with him !!
When he finds out what the church has taught on blacks for over 100 years he will be shocked.I will try helping him as the opportunity arises .
the 4 asylum seekers are not working ( maybe a little illegally and the church doesn't pull them up on it - probably hoping for it to be tithed ), so they are not very good for tithes (very small income ).
But it seems that when the church helps them get asylum , it will get them into work and expect pay up time . I wonder if they'll stay then ???
Its similar in the other ward with Asylum seekers and one lonely elderly pensioner lady
Baptism is a Con in this religion .Its meaningless . To be saved in the highest heaven you have to pay up .They keep this from investigators until they've conned them into blabbing a testimony and then they are effectively trapped once the tithe is dropped on them .Meat after Milk !!
They are going look stupid if they try to change their mind !!
The other area for converts is poorer African countries where information is not available and anyway most brothers and sisters will be probably joining to get an opportunity to get to America and all the best to them , that's why Gordon Hinckley is probably telling people to build Zion where they are .In other words stay put we don't want you here in America !! lol
Elder Joseph
Elder Joseph,
I know what you mean, where I'm from a large majority of the converts are from Sudan, and other parts of Afrika. What gets me is how when we had to do home teaching it was if we were talking down to them... like hey you're stupid so just do what I'm telling you, and it's wrong. Preying on those who don't know any better. And you're right it is Called Elders Quorum, I called it priesthood in the midst of being on a rant. :) I don't know if you'll ever get a chance to but i had the opportunity to go with some of the missionaries to help give "my testimony" and it's amazing where they go and this could just be my experience but they only head to the poorest neighborhoods. I remember one time we went to this lady's house, there were cockroaches all over the place and about 7 people crammed into a 2 bedroom house. She supported her kids by dj'ing at a club, the missionaries where telling her to quit her job because the environment will lead to temptation and all sorts of other bad things. I wanted to be like if she quits, how is she going to support everyone, no one here is offering her a job.
The best part about 1st Sundays,when people got up to give their testimony was they were all the same, but with little twist. Just say what people need to hear to feel good, but don't go too far into it.
But when I held my last farewell at Elders Quorum, I was so nervous, like I'm going to be turning my back on something I've lived and breathed and like in Samuel's podcasts, defended from verbal assaults. Tears and suffering and pain, my family mocked me when i converted, telling me it was all a cult and joked about "when was i going to join the POD on the spaceship. but I was dead set on proving them wrong, but in the end it was I who was wrong, I who was naive and stupid. But now I feel as if i was hoodwinked, but feel that much better when on Sunday I don't have to get up and sit through 3 hrs of propaganda.
The ACLU
adreian,
I tried to enquire in church about the black priesthood ban and terrible remarks on black skin by Brigham Young and many other lds prophets and apostles up to Spencer Kimball .
I ended up in the bishops office . He brushed it all off smugly and asked me not to show it to the Black Brothers in church. I felt a bit of a chill in my spine .
So I changed the subject and asked ' how exactly did Joseph Smith translate the plates ? ' . My Bishop said "he put the two glass seer stones over the plates and saw the translation , but i'm not 100% sure "
It confirmed to me there and then the whole thing was a farce ! lol
I've missed two Sundays out recently and I think they are a bit rattled at what I've discovered and what my convert friend is not shy about to bring up face to face with them like 'the head in a hat ', 'the fact that the witnesses never really saw the plates in reality but only with the eye of faith ?' lol some kind of second sight ?? what the !!!
The more I look , the more I see there is nothing really there . A whole hoax and concoption from the beginning based on emotion playing of each other.
It's scary actually to be on the end of this subtle deception.
Don't worry about feeling naive and stupid . Its the same for us all . I nearly joined the Jehovahs Witnesses as a youth ! Thats where I learned my lesson ! lol
Elder Joseph
Adreian,
We were all there. We all defended the church because we were so sure it was true. I debated with my friends and I boldly challenged them to "wait and see" until the next life. I was so sure about it that I would have bet my life on it.
It sucks when you discover the truth, but at least you have. And at least you didn't waste your entire childhood in this brainwashing cult. It is much harder, I think, for people to get out who were born and raised in it with die-hard parents.
It sucks when you are growing up, discovering yourself and your body, and thinking that your are a pile of scum just for being alive. I'll never believe that again. I refuse to believe that I am worthless just because I am human. Any religion that teaches that you are a scumbag from birth and deserve to go to hell for nothing is just trying to humiliate you so they can control you. Honestly, what loving god would teach that?
Here was a comment I just got on the podcast I did about the 2 sister missionaries that were brutally raped in South Africa:
Cameron has left a new comment on your post "Mormon Truth Uncensored #3-More On The Brutal Assa...":
The church does care about people and what happens to its members, but you need to move on in all things. Did America suddenly just give up everything after the September 11th attacks? No, we moved on, while still showing care and compassion for those affected by the attacks. You must accept the things that happen in life and move. It's part of the journey of life. I'm sure there are people who are worried about you and want to try and bring you back into the church someday; maybe your family or people from your old ward? Your blind to the real truth or just refuse to accept it. Instead you try to hide behind what you want to make out as the real truth. I hope someday when your older you will realize your mistakes, and when that day comes the church will be there for you with open and loving arms to welcome you again. Remember, God will always love you no matter what. Take care.
Posted by Cameron to Mormon Truth Uncensored!! at Tue Apr 03, 02:41:00 PM 2007
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I guess to Cameron, moving on, means the 2 sisters that were brutally raped for hours at gun and knife point, should finish their missions, right? After all, that was Brock Jolley's(their mission president) focus, right after the attacks.
You notice how much love, compassion and understanding TBMS and Mormon leaders have? I mean seriously, they really are like robots and it's all about the church, the work, etc, no matter what happens, just like Ballard says. My leaders never gave a damn about me when I was puking my guts up, just that I was holding up "the work."
I mean after all, it was the ASSHOLE Ballard, that stated he doesn't give a shit if more missionaries are hurt or killed, because the work must go on.
Here is a link to Ballard's comments:
I just thought I'd share this with you guys, so that everyone could see the utter lack of compassion in a typical TBM, that feels that first and foremost, the work must go on. Amazing that baptisms are more important than life itself, isn't it? Oh yeah, but it's never about the numbers!!
Samuel
Comments like this one from Cameron don't really bother me as much until they start assuming that we "know the truth" and are "just rebelling against it". The church will welcome our tithing back with open arms. We are "blind to the truth". That speaks volumes about how ignorant these TBM's are. The more I read REAL church history, the blinder I got. Damnit. The more I educated myself, the more rebellious I became. The more I used my brain, the more the spirit just slipped away.
Intellectuals... the church hates them. Anyone who starts thinking ends up leaving the church. The church hates common sense because it wins every time! They discourage their members from thinking and using their brains with statements like, "when the prophet speaks, the thinking has been done." And using scriptures that condemn intellectuals.
A smart person has no place in heaven. God only wants mindless morons to surround him and praise him for all eternity. Guess what?!?! If I have to spend eternity in heaving worshiping god all the time, I'll pass, thanks! I think that would get pretty old and boring after a while. But I'm sure god would love it!
If you really think about it, heaven would be hell. It would be like being in church all the damn time! And what is worse is that you have to be good and righteous all the time and never get to laugh or have any fun.
Ok, I'm ranting now. Ignorant commenters like Cameron get me going.
Samuel, it isn't too late. You can come back. This blog makes it all too clear that you're still angry and bitter regarding the outcome of your church disciplinary hearing, but you don't have to carry that around with you forever. Many people, it's true, leave the church forever after being disfellowshipped or excommunicated, but there have been plenty of others who, angry or offended, left the church and who eventually found they had great reserves of inner strength--enough to admit their errors, repent and return.
The one who told Saul it was hard for him to kick against the pricks is the same being who waits now for your return to the Gospel. He will not force you to do anything you don't want to do; that, as you once knew, is the point and purpose of Earth life, to see if we will still make wise choices in a learning environment where our sure knowledge of God's existence has been temporarily veiled. But you know he calls for you to cease your persecution on this small soapbox and return to the Gospel. You may not want to hear him; you may be metaphorically jamming your fingers in your ears and claiming there's nothing to hear, but that doesn't negate his existence.
It isn't too late. Unless you've killed somebody recently, forgiveness in this life and salvation in the next is not beyond your reach. Come back.
Hey Messenger, you have your head firmly lodged right up your ass and have no idea what your even talking about, which is normal for you TBM apologists!! Who cares about facts, truth and reality, right? I mean hey, complete speculation presented as absolute fact, is your middle name and what you guys base everything you do on.
First of all, as far as the church goes and the records, I'm still a member in good standing. I've never had a church court and never been disciplined in any way for anything. I could go to church this Sunday and record the whole meeting if I wanted to. I could just pay my tithing and go back to the temple within a few months and nobody would be the wiser.
Then again, maybe they could use their "magic" powers of discernment to find me, just like they find child predators and child sex abusers, right? Kind of like the Former Mormon Bishop Timothy McCleve or the former Mormon Seventy George P. Lee and how they DIDN'T find them, rather the police did, after the victims came forward.
Anyway, you Mormon TBM Apologists are a joke and an embarrassment. Quit assuming that you know a Goddamn thing about me or any of us ex-Mormons when you know nothing. You're an idiot and your comments only support that.
Thanks for exposing yourself as who you really are and I'll never EVER go back to Mormonism, no matter much you fast and pray to your big man in the sky. The Mormon church is nothing but a fraud that destroys lives and families and melts people's brains, like it has done to yours.
It's a pretty sad scenario that no matter how good a life I live, no matter how good of a person, father, and husband I am, it will all come down to God asking me one thing: are you Mormon and do you sustain my pedophile/horny Prophet Joseph Smith? That's what it's all about isn't it? Good to know that you'll be able to say YES GOD, ABSOLUTELY!!
Samuel
Hello prophet Samuel,
keep up the excellent work.because I am also a ex-mormon who left the lds cult.because my former bishop who is now stake president also sexually abused his step daughter,who was also my friend.and this same evil bishop who is now stake president has now gotten this same step daughter pregnant and have fathered several children by his step daughter.while he is still married to her mother.what a evil abomination this evil act is before the lord.because just like this creep and scum named timothy mccleve have been exposed and busted for his corruption,so should my former evil bishop be brought to justice the same way.because the mormon cult is pure evil and those evil lds leaders shall lift their eyes up in hell.and Samuel my freind I am sure in the soon coming future even right now.more allegations of corruption and sexual abuse is going to be brought to the forefront by more victims.because this sexual abuser mccleve is getting just what he deserve.hell in a jail cell.
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